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Cow Car Frequently Asked Questions -- handled by Tony

Do you work at Ben & Jerry's or Gateway 2000?

No. I work at Wildfire Communications, Inc.

Then why is your car painted like a cow?

Just for fun.

Does she moo?

Yes! I installed the Mooz Control Option Package (ask your dealer). A
button makes her moo with 0 watts of gusto. The regular horn beeps as
always (most cows have 2 horns).

Who painted her?

She was a white Miata. I realized she was a cow at heart. My friend
Patti put me in touch with Woody Jackson (the man who did the artwork
for Ben & Jerry's). I asked him to help reveal the Holstein within my
car. Woody offered to paint a model car, so I built a /24th scale
Miata, and Woody generously designed the scheme and refused efforts to
repay him. (Thank you Woody!) I based my work on his scheme, simplifying
it somewhat. I masked out the patterns with a vinyl tape, filled in the
broad regions with masking tape, and took her to Maaco. They sprayed her
black. After drying, I removed the masking, and voila a cow car!

Does the cow car have a name?

Well, Jessie-- But I mostly just call her The Little Cow Car. I find
myself talking to her alot. You'd be surprised at how many people call
her a "cow car" when they see her for the first time. The name is
inescapable.

Why Jessie?

I wrote a story named "Jessie the Cow".

Why does the license say HOW-NOW? Isn't that "How now, brown cow?"

Yes. I'd be very interested in discovering the origin of that phrase.
The truth is that I asked for "MILK-ME" and the Registry people nixed
it. I see HOW-NOW as reflecting a confident air that says, "I'm a cow
car and I feel good about it. Who are YOU?". The subtext, however,
remains "Milk me!"

Are there other cow cars?

Yes! I have seen a half dozen with my own eyes. The cow car gets all
happy to have friends and moos with glee. If you own a cow car, send
mine email (cowcar@cow.net) and we can arrange a cattle drive.

Are they on the Web?

Yes! Some guy has a Some guy VW beetle and someone else has a VW camper.


Can I send email to the other cow cars?

Not that I know of. Cow cars face real challenges in getting access.
It's a problem.

That sucks! Maybe someone should offer services to get cow cars better
access.

That's a good idea. COWZ is a Bovine-inspired computer Bulletin Board
System that offers internet access and email connectivity for people and
cow cars alike. They are really fun people, and they helped the cow car
get hooked up. Go check them out!

Can I have a ride? I want to make the cow car moo!

You can always ask. The cow car and I enjoy people who have a sense of
fun. Just stop me if you see me parking.

Moo! Moo! Ahem -- I mean, where can I find more cow information?

I think you better visit Big Dave's Cow Page.

Why doesn't everyone drive a cow car?

I blame narrow attitudes in Detroit. I mean, what jerk came up with the
marketing jingle, "Cattle lack, cattle lack, cattle lack style?" How
mean-spirited can you be?

Is there a downside to driving a cow car?

Sometimes, it is tough to have a lifetime tenure as the ambassador of
fun. It is not easy to be pissed off when there are kids waving who
deserve a smile and a wave back.

Do you ever drive other cars?

The cow car is my only car. But sometimes I go on a trip and rent a car
and find it reassuring that people stop pointing and laughing at me.

I was in Harvard Square and... and... I was MOOED! REPEATEDLY!

It sounds like my friend Keith must have been at the Mooz Control button
that day. The police suspect him of several unsolved drive-by mooings,
and I have to say he is more reckless about it than I am.

Basically, this seems to be a car pretending to be a cow. What if you
approached this from the other angle?

I suppose if a cow thought it was a car, it would invite the development
of products like the cow wash.


CowCar Homepage

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