Reflections...

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Reflections...


ON METAPHYSICS
     Deja Fu: The feeling that somehow, somewhere, you've been kicked in 
     the head like this before.
     
     ON DEEP THOUGHTS
     A day without sunshine is like night.
     
     ON PARADOX AND RETURN POLICIES
     There is a CD out entitled "The Worst of Jefferson Airplane". If 
     you buy this, take it home, play it, and enjoy it, should you take 
     it back and demand a refund?
     
     ON HIGHER EDUCATION
     College is a fountain of knowledge...and the students are there to 
     drink.
     
     ON MATHEMATICAL TRANSFORMS
     A polar bear is a rectangular bear after a coordinate transform.
     
     ON YOUTH
     "Some people say that I must be a horrible person, but that's not 
     true. I have the heart of a young boy -- in a jar on my desk."
     -- Stephen King,/8/90
     
     ON PROBLEM SOLVING
     When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to 
     resemble a nail.-- Abraham Maslow
     
     ON MATERIALISM
     He who dies with the most toys, is, nonetheless, still dead.
     
     ON RELIGIOUS PRACTICES
     Photons have mass?  I didn't know they were catholic!
     
     ON INFINITY
     If you had everything, where would you keep it?
     
     ON ECONOMICS
     The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity.
     
     ON PUBLISHING OR PERISHING
     I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because 
     someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the 
     top.
     -- English Professor, Ohio University
     
     ON REVISIONIST HISTORY
     What was sliced bread the greatest thing since?
     
     ON DATING
     When aiming for the common denominator, be prepared for the 
     occasional division by zero.
     
     ON LAMENTATION
     Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
     
     ON POETIC LOVE
     When you're swimmin' in the creek
     And an eel bites your cheek
     That's a moray!
      -- Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers
     
     ON MATERIAL SCIENCE
     Character density:  The number of very weird people in the office.
     
     ON EXTINCTION
     Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
     
     ON LITERATURE
     This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown 
     with great force.-- Dorothy Parker
     
     ON HUMILITY
     To err is human, to moo bovine.
     
     ON PROPHECY
     The meek shall inherit the earth---they are too weak to refuse.
     
     ON EXCUSES
     I can't complain, but sometimes I still do.-- Joe Walsh
     
     ON NUMBERS
     Grabel's Law: 2 is not equal to---not even for very large values 
     of 2.
     
     ON WORLD POLITICS
     Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggy" until you can find a 
     rock.
     
     ON DRUGS AND DEVELOPMENT
     There are two major products to come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX. 
     We don't believe this to be a coincidence.


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