Drinking Quotes

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Drinking Quotes


You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an
airline; It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or
some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.
 -- Frank Zappa

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk.  That will teach
you to keep your mouth shut.
 -- Ernest Hemmingway

Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than
alcohol has taken out of me.
 -- Winston Churchill

He was a wise man who invented beer.
 -- Plato

Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time.
 -- Catherine Zandonella

Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink.
 -- Lady Astor to Winston Churchill

Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it.
 -- His reply.

If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us
stomachs.
 -- David Daye

Work is the curse of the drinking class.
 -- Oscar Wilde

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
 -- Henny Youngman

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
 -- Benjamin Franklin

If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet
it makes beer shoot out your nose.
 -- Deep Thought, Jack Handy

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of
mankind is beer.  Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine
invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
 -- Dave Barry

The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks
behind.
 -- Humphrey Bogart

Why is American beer served cold?  So you can tell it from urine.
 -- David Moulton

People who drink light "beer" don't like the taste of beer; they
just like to pee a lot.
 -- Capital Brewery, Middleton, WI

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.
 -- Kaiser Wilhelm

I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer.
 -- Homer Simpson

Not all chemicals are bad.  Without chemicals such as hydrogen
and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a
vital ingredient in beer.
 -- Dave Barry

I drink to make other people interesting.
 -- George Jean Nathan

They who drink beer will think beer.
 -- Washington Irving

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time
with his fools.
 -- For Whom the Bell Tolls, Ernest Hemmingway

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
 -- Dean Martin


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