Modern Conveniences

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Modern Conveniences


A guy walks into a bar and sits down. He starts dialing numbers... 
like a telephone... on his hand, then talking into his hand. The 
bartender walks over and tells him that this is a very tough 
neighborhood and he doesn't need any trouble here.

The guy says, "You don't understand. I'm very hi-tech. I had a 
phone installed in my hand because I was tired of carrying the 
cellular."

The bartender says "Prove it." The guy dials up a number and hands 
his hand to the bartender. The bartender talks into the hand and 
carries on a conversation.

"That's incredible", says the bartender..."I would never have 
believed it!"

"Yeah", said the guy, "I can keep in touch with my broker, my 
wife, you name it. By the way, where is the men's room?" The 
bartender directs him to the men's room. The guy goes in and 5, 
10, 20 minutes go by and he doesn't return. Fearing the worst, 
given the neighborhood, the bartender goes into the men's room.

There is the guy spread- eagle on the wall. His pants are pulled 
down and he has a roll of toilet paper up his butt. "Oh my god!" 
said the bartender.  "Did they rob you? Are you hurt?"

The guy turns to him and says: "No, I'm ok... I'm just waiting 
for a fax."


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