The Vermonter's Guide to Computer Lingo

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The Vermonter's Guide to Computer Lingo


Log On:        Makin' the wood stove hotter. 
 Log Off:       Don't add wood.
 Monitor:       Keep an eye on the wood stove. 
 Download:      Gettin' the firewood off the pickup.
 Mega Hertz:    When yer not carefull downloadin' (watch th' toes!) 
 Floppy Disk:   Whacha get from pilin' too much firewood.
 RAM:           The hydraulic thingy that makes the woodsplitter work. 
 Hard Drive:    Gettin' home in mud season.
 Prompt:        What you wish the mail was in mud season. 
 Windows:       What to shut when it's0 below.
 Screen:        What you need for black fly season. 
 Byte:          What black flies do.
 Chip:          What to munch on.
 Micro Chip:    What's left in the bag when the chips are gone. 
 Infrared:      Where the left-over's go when Fred's around. 
 Modem:         What you did to the hay fields.
 Dot Matrix:    Farmer Matrix's wife.
 Lap Top:       Where little kids feel comfy 
 Keyboard:      Where you hang your keys. 
 Software:      Them plastic eatin' utensils.
 Mouse:         What eats the horses' grain in the barn. 
 Main Frame:    The part of the barn that holds the roof up. 
 Port:          Fancy wine.
 Enter:         C'mon in!
 Random Access Memory: You can't remember how much that new rifle cost 
 when your wife asks.


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