More Profound Thoughts

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More Profound Thoughts


Be nice to your kids.  They'll choose your nursing home.

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder...

...Every morning is the dawn of a new error...

A flying saucer results when a nudist spills his coffee.

For people who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord.

I can see clearly now, the brain is gone...

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

I used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead.

Mental Floss prevents Moral Decay.

Madness takes its toll.  Please have exact change.

There cannot be a crisis today; my schedule is already full.

I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

Look out for #.  Don't step in #2 either.

Car service:  If it ain't broke, we'll break it.

Shin: A device for finding furniture in the dark.

Dain bramaged.

What has four legs and an arm?  A happy pit bull.

2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2.

Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.

My software never has bugs.  It just develops random features.

<-------- The information went data way -------->

Best file compression around:  "DEL *.*" = 00% compression

The Definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones
 in.

BREAKFAST.COM Halted...Cereal Port Not Responding

The name is Baud......, James Baud.

Access denied--nah nah na nah nah!

As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.

Southern DOS: Y'all reckon? (Yep/Nope)

E Pluribus Modem

... File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)

A computer's attention span is as long as its power cord.

24 hours in a day...24 beers in a case...coincidence?

Disinformation is not as good as datinformation.

RAM disk is *not* an installation procedure.

All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?

Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F to continue.

Excuse me for butting in, but I'm interrupt-driven.

Hit any user to continue.

Disk Full - Press F to belch.

(A)bort, (R)etry, (G)et a beer?

Programmers don't die, they just GOSUB without RETURN.

Real programmers don't document.  If it was hard to write, it
should be hard to understand.


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