The Nature of Hell

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The Nature of Hell


"Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Support your answer with a proof."

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas
cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or = some
variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time.

So, we need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate
they are leaving.  I think that we can safely assume that once a = soul
gets to Hell, it will not leave.  Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for
how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions
that exist in the world today.  Some of these religions state that if you
are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are
more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more
than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to 
Hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls
in Hell to increase exponentially.  Now, we look at the rate of change of
the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the
temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has
to expand as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities.

#1 If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls 
enter Hell, then the temperature  and pressure in Hell will increase 
until all Hell breaks loose.

#2 Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of
souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell
freezes over.

So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Ms. Therese
Banyan during my  Freshman year, "That it will be a cold night in Hell
before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I still 
have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then #2 cannot 
be true, and so Hell is exothermic.

The student got the only A.


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