Quoted from restroom walls

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Quoted from restroom walls


Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
- Rest Area off I-84.  Willington, Connecticut.

If you can piss this high, join the fire department.
- On the wall in the men's restroom at a height of 6 feet.
  O'Ryan's Irish Pub.   Ashland, Oregon.

Don't switch dicks in the middle of a screw. Stick with Nixon.
- Nathan's.  Washington, D.C.

Beauty is only a light switch away.
- Perkins Library.  Duke University.  Durham, North Carolina.

I've decided that to raise my grades I must lower my 
standards.
- Houghton Library, Harvard University.  Cambridge, Massachusetts.

Beer. It's not just for breakfast anymore.
- Blueberry Hill.  St. Louis, Missouri.

If life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life,
then let's all get wasted together and have the time of our 
lives.
- Armand's Pizza.  Washington, D.C.

You either make dust or you eat dust.
- Arizona State University, Daniel E. Noble Science &
  Engineering Library.  Tempe, Arizona.

If Bush were captain of the Titanic, he'd say we were
stopping for ice.  
- Smoky Joe's.  Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

Remember, it's not, "How high are you?" it's "Hi, how are 
you?"
- Rest stop off Route 81.  West Virginia.

Beware of limbo dancers.
- On the bottom of the stall door, Women's Restroom, Broad 
  Ripple Brew Pub.  Indianapolis, Indiana.

Rome wasn't built in a day.
That's because it was a government job.
- Women's Restroom.  City View Tavern.  Cincinnati, Ohio.

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal 
lobotomy.
- Bailey Howe Library, University of Vermont.  Burlington, 
  Vermont.

Hey, your karma just ran over my dogma.
- Blueberry Hill.  St. Louis, Missouri.

Flush twice-It's a long way to the kitchen.
- Restroom, Washakie Cafeteria, University of Wyoming. 
  Laramie, Wyoming.

God made pot.  Man made beer.  Who do you trust?
- The Irish Times.  Washington, D.C.

Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
- The Bayou, Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

Time flies like the wind.  Fruit flies like bananas.
- Women's restroom, The Ice House.  Wilmington, North
  Carolina.

No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and
tired of putting up with her shit.
- Men's Room, Linda's Bar and Grill.  Chapel Hill, North 
  Carolina.

To do is to be.
- Descartes
To be is to do.
- Voltaire
Do be do be do.
- Frank Sinatra
- Men's restroom, Greasewood Flats.  Scottsdale, Arizona.

At the feast of ego, everyone leaves hungry.
- Bentley's House of Coffee and Tea, Tucson, Arizona.

Chris-Just remember that this dollar is not to be spent
until everything between us is over (completely).  
Please remember I love you!-Tori 
- On dollar bill F602225237.

It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.
- Written in the dust on the back of a bus.  Wickenburg, 
  Arizona.

Make love, not war.
Hell, do both, get married!
- Women's restroom, The Filling Station.  Bozeman, Montana.

God is dead.
- Nietzsche
Nietzsche is dead.
- God
- The Tombs Restaurant.  Washington, D.C.

I sold my expectations to reality and got ripped off.
- The Underground.  Blacksburg, Virginia.

A word in the mouth is worth two from George Bush.
I don't understand. 
That's okay, Dan.
- H.L. Mencken's Cultured Pearl Restaurant and Bar. 
  Baltimore, Maryland.

If voting could really change things, it would be illegal.
- Revolution Books.  New York, New York.

This bubble gum tastes like rubber.
Yeah, but it lasts a long time.
And it blows great bubbles.
- Condom machine.  Missoula, Montana.

A Woman's Rule of Thumb:  If it has tires or testicles,
you're going to have trouble with it.
- Women's restroom, Dick's Last Resort.  Dallas, Texas.

JESUS SAVES!
But wouldn't it be better if he had invested?
- Men's restroom, American University.  Washington, D.C.

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
- The Cellar Restaurant, Blacksburg, Virginia.

My mother was the travel agent for guilt trips.
- Blueberry Hill.  St. Louis, Missouri.

Just 'cause it's clean don't mean it's fresh.
- Port O'John, Acadia National Park,  Maine.

If pro is opposite of con, then what is the opposite of
progress?  Congress!
- Men's restroom, House of Representatives.  Washington, D.C.

LSD consumes 47 times its weight in excess reality.
- Men's restroom, The 400 bar.  Minneapolis, Minnesota.

I used to be into necrophilia and bestiality...but then I
realized I was just kicking a dead horse.
- The Cellar Restaurant.  Blacksburg, Virginia.

If it wasn't intended to be eaten, it wouldn't be shaped
like a taco.
- Nathan's.  Washington, D.C.

Why do drunk men miss the toilet?
Why do sober men?
- South Main Cafe.  Blacksburg, Virginia.

Free the bound periodicals!
- Library, Indiana University.  Bloomington, Indiana.

What are you looking up on the wall for?  The joke is in
your hands.
- Men's restroom Lynagh's.  Lexington, Kentucky.

Hey Nike, I just did it!
- Tastee Diner, Bethesda, Maryland.


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