How to lose weight

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How to lose weight


Did you hear about the heavyset guy who had tried
every diet in the world in an attempt to lose weight?
He tried the Scarsdale diet,the Navy diet, Weight Watchers,
and many more. None worked. Then, one day,
he was reading the Washington Post when he noticed
a small ad that read:
Lose weight Only $1.00 a pound
Call (202) 555-0238

The man decided to give it a try and called the number.
A voice on the other end asked, "How much weight do you want
to lose?" The man responded, "Ten pounds."The voice replied,
"Very well, give me your credit card number and we"ll have
a representative over to your house in the morning."

About 9:00 am the next morning the man gets a knock on the door.
There stood a beautiful redhead, completely naked except for
a sign around her neck stating, "If you catch me, you can have
me."

Well,the hefty fellow chased her upstairs, downstairs, over
sofas, through the kitchen, all around the house. Finally,
panting and wheezing like a dog, he did catch her. When he
was through enjoying himself, she said,
"Quick, go into the bathroom and weigh yourself."
He did just that and was amazed to find that he had lost ten
pounds, right to the ounce!

That evening he called the number again. The voice on the
other end asked, "How much weight do you want to lose?"--to
which the somewhat-less-overweight man replied,
"Twenty pounds." "Very well," the voice on the phone told him,
"Give me your credit card number and we"ll have a representative
over to your house in the morning.

"At about 8:00 am the next morning the man
receives a knock on the door. When he opens the door he sees
a beautiful blonde dressed only in track shoes and a sign
around her neck stating, "If you catch me, you can have me."
The chase took a good while longer this time and the man
nearly passed out, but he finally did catch her. When he was
through she told him, "Quick, run into the bathroom and
weigh yourself." He ran to the bathroom and found he had lost
another 20 pounds! "This is fantastic!" he thought
to himself.

Later that evening he called the number again
and the voice at the other end asked, "How much weight do
you want to lose?" "Fifty pounds!" the man exclaimed.
"Fifty pounds?" the voice asked, "That"s an awful lot of weight
to lose at one time." The man replied, "Listen buddy,
here"s my credit card number, you just have your representative
over here in the morning!" and he hung up the phone.

About 6:00 am the next morning the man gets out of bed, splashes
on some cologne and gets all ready for the next representative.
At about 7:00 am he gets a knock on the door. When he opens
the door, he sees this large gorilla with a sign around his
neck stating, "If I catch you, I am going to have YOU."


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