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STAR: Trek vs. Wars

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STAR: Trek vs. Wars
TOP TEN REASONS WHY THE STAR WARS CHARACTERS WOULD KICK BUTT IN THE STAR TREK UNIVERSE 10) In the Star Wars Universe weapons are rarely, if ever, set on "stun". 9) The Enterprise needs a huge engine room with an anti-matter unit and a crew of 20 just to go into warp --- The Millennium Falcon does the same thing with R2-D2 and a Wookie. 8) After resisting the Imperial torture droid and Darth Vader, Princess Leia still looked fresh and desirable --- After pithy Cardassian starvation torture, Picard looked like hell. 7) One word: Lightsabers. 6) Darth Vader could choke the entire Borg empire with one glance. 5) The Death Star doesn't care if a world is class "M" or not. 4) Luke Skywalker is not obsessed with sleeping with every alien he encounters. 3) Jabba the Hutt would eat Harry Mudd for trying to cut in on his action. 2) The Federation would have to attempt to liberate any ship named "Slave I". 1) Picard pilots the Enterprise through asteroid belts at one-quarter impulse power --- Han Solo floors it. TOP TEN REASONS WHY THE STAR WARS CHARACTERS MIGHT NOT HAVE SUCH AN EASY TIME OF IT IN KIRKS UNIVERSE... 10) In the Star Wars Universe the weapons rarely, if ever, can be rigged to power small planets. 9) Like I said; Scotty and one phaser. 8) After his first major fight Luke looses a hand and runs away. Kirk gets into all out fist fight brawls every day with any number of aliens, and only cuts his lip and tears his shirt, which by the way only serves to piss him off. 7) One word: Transporters. 6) HAVE YOU SEEN WHAT KLINGONS EAT!!! 5) Kirk is only concerned with class "M" because there may be chicks on it. 4) Luke Skywalker is NOT obsessed with sleeping with every alien he encounters. What's wrong with that boy? 3) Kahn would wait0 years on a desert hell planet for the soul purpose of plucking out Jaba's eyes and having them for lunch. 2) Spock can talk to cement creatures. 1) C'mon we all know the Enterprise has no set limitations on it's speed. The more dire the situation the faster Scotty can get that ship going. With a little help from some rerouted phasers and the front radar array Kirk has had that bad boy going warp 13+, and if there were a Green Chick at the other end it could go faster!
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Entered on: 05/12/1998
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