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sander@chromatic.com from xenon.chromatic.com id AA19480; Tue, 10 Dec 96 22:36:01 EST from quasar.chromatic.com ([140.174.118.36]) by xenon.chromatic.com (8.7.5/8.7.3) with SMTP id TAA27913; Tue, 10 Dec 1996 19:35:44 -0800 (PST) <2.2.32.19961211033546.0075710c@xenon.chromatic.com> X-Sender: sander@xenon.chromatic.com X-Mailer: Windows Eudora Pro Version 2.2 (32) Mime-Version: 1.0 Date: Tue, 10 Dec 1996 19:35:46 -0800 To: humor@chromatic.com, ron-l@centerline.com From: Sander Pool Subject: [Fwd: Oracle Xmas Party e-mail] Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii" Content-Length: 12512 this seems like something that has been around the block a few times (apparently it happened in '94) but I hadn't seen it yet. Here goes. Scroll to the end for the meat. >How many of you know people at or fomerly at Oracle??? Read on... > >> Date: Wed, 04 Dec 96 14:39 >> From: jc@bcpllc.com (Jim Cardillo) >> To: doug@pbi.net >> Subject: Oracle e-mail >> >> Well, here's a copy of the infamous Oracle E-mail. >> >> For those of you who haven't heard, a woman at Oracle sent the attached bio >> out on all of her eligible friends via e-mail. The purpose was to get them >> hooked up w/dates for the Christmas party, and it subsequently made its way >> around the entire company. Of course, Larry Ellison eventually got it, and >> the >> shit hit the fan. >> >> Apparently, she almost got fired. I heard about this this weekend, and >> today, someone else forwarded it to me. I have included all of the >> forwarded messages to give a sense of how many times this thing got >> forwarded. Very funny. >> >> Good women are hard to find. But not at Oracle. Make sure you read the >> forwarded messages too...WL >> >> Why can't I find any women like these??? >> >> ---------- >> Look what our friends at Oracle are up to these days... >> >> ---------- >> >> From: schmitt@vitesse.com@Internet(MENLO PARK-GATE1) >> >> Oh, man. I can't believe this chick. Read all the forwards too, kinda cool. >> ---------- >> Hey guys, >> >> This is pretty funny: >> >> ---- Begin Included Message ----- >> >> Get a load of this. It's worth reading the forwarding messages. And yes, I >> do know the author of this message (but not THAT well) >> >> Amy Umpleby >> Multimedia Specialist, New Media Applications >> Oracle Corporation >> aumpleby@oracle.com >> 500 Oracle Parkway phone: (415) 506-9193 >> Box 659504 fax: (415) 506-7103 >> Redwood Shores, CA 94065 modem: >> (415) 413-3098 >> >> ----------------------- >> Date: 05 Aug 96 16:31:39 >> From:"Hector Osorio " >> >> To:aumpleby,kattubat >> Subject:Fwd: Just in case the pipeline breaks... >> >> Here's the infamous Oracle Party message... >> >> Hector I. Osorio Oracle Corporation >> Senior Technical Staff 500 Oracle Parkway >> Oracle Media Applications Development >> MS-659504, Office# 456 >> New Media Division Redwood Shores, CA 94065 >> >> E-mail: >> Voice:(415) 506-2616 Fax:(415) 506-7103 >> >> Date: 05 Dec 94 04:45:06 >> From:"Michael Lin" >> MLIN.US.ORACLE.COM> >> To:hosorio,nbhutani,jazure >> Subject:Fwd: Just in case the pipeline breaks... >> >> Hector, This might be of interest to you... >> >> Michael Lin >> --------------------------------------------------------------------- >> EMAIL: mlin=@oracle.com PHONE:415-506-3213 >> LOCATION: 500 OP328 >> ----------------------- >> Date: 05 Dec 94 12:23:58 >> From:"Judith Sim, Technical Marketing >> (415)506-5234" >> >> To:mlin,suwalsh,elogsdon,mavilez,pyiu >> Subject:Fwd: Just in case the pipeline breaks... >> >> Can you guys believe this? Marvin? >> >> - Judy >> ------------------------ >> >> Date: 05 Dec 94 04:03:20 >> From:"Lauren Ames x5327" >> >> To:laura,jsim,mzirelli,kgainey,nnorman,jkeavney >> Subject:Fwd: Just in case the pipeline breaks... >> >> No way. >> >> Lauren Ames >> Senior Manager, Multimedia Programs >> Oracle Corporation >> (415) 506-5327 >> --------------------------- >> >> Date: 05 Dec 94 11:48:33 >> From:"John Kurtz" >> >> To:rcrowley,pbuscemi,bstill,lames,akraaijv,psenator >> Subject:Fwd: Just in case the pipeline breaks... >> >> just another day at Oracle. >> >> John Kurtz >> phone 415-506-5286 >> fax 415-506-7801 >> >> ---------------------- >> >> Date: 05 Dec 94 10:26:47 >> From:"Neil Monnens, Advertising" >> >> To:jkurtz >> Subject:Fwd: Just in case the pipeline breaks... >> >> ------------------------- >> >> Date: 02 Dec 94 17:00:38 >> From:"Martha Hill >> " >> >> To:neil >> Subject:Fwd: Just in case the pipeline breaks... >> >> neil, you won't believe this one. read the >> attached message >> >> Regards, >> >> Martha Hill >> Hardware Buyer >> (415) 506-3484 - Direct >> (415) 506-3231 - Hardware/Software Hotline >> (415) 506-1102 - Fax >> >> ---------------------------- >> >> Date: 02 Dec 94 16:59:40 >> From:"Vikki Lira" >> >> To:mahill,steph,lynn >> Subject:Fwd: Just in case the pipeline breaks... >> Reply-to:VLIRA >> >> check this out >> >> Regards, >> Vikki Lira >> Buyer >> 415.506.3491 >> 415.506.1102 >> >> ------------------------------ >> >> Date: 02 Dec 94 15:44:37 >> From:"TCARRARI.US.ORACLE.COM" >> >> To:mmoye,nhuening,eestess,kswanson,vlira, mphillip >> Subject:Fwd: Just in case the pipeline breaks... >> >> Unbelievable... >> >> Read on. >> ------------------------------- >> >> Date: 02 Dec 94 14:41:40 >> From:"Melissa Rouse " >> >> To:aklein,edruker,jwheeler,rskarste,tcarrari,cmacdona,sfacey,skduvall, >> jbrush >> Subject:Fwd: Just in case the pipeline breaks... >> >> I can't believe this is a real person... >> >> Thank you, >> >> Melissa Rouse >> Account Executive >> DMD Eastern Region >> 415-506-8455 >> >> ----------------------------- >> >> Date: 02 Dec 94 15:11:32 >> From:"Mark Cusumano " >> >> To:melissa,fiend,greg >> Subject:Fwd: Just in case the pipeline breaks... >> Reply-to:mcusuman@oracle.com >> >> are you kidding? lance, read on.... >> >> Regards, >> Mark Cusumano >> Support & Documentation Sales >> 415.506.5265 (Phone) >> 415.506.7674 (Fax) >> >> --------------------------- >> >> Date: 02 Dec 94 15:05:10 >> From:"Peter Newell >> PNEWELL.US.ORACLE.COM" >> >> To:gburkhol,mcusuman,gloos,labrown,peanders,tdurnin >> Subject:Fwd: Just in case the pipeline breaks... >> Cc:jgislaso >> >> Just in case you guys are still looking or don't want to take your >> girlfriends. >> >> Thanks, >> Peter Newell >> Support Sales >> 415-506-5182 >> >> ----------------------------- >> >> Date: 02 Dec 94 11:26:21 >> From:"Jamie Lev " >> >> To:pnewell,mhartley@attic.portal.com >> Subject:Fwd: Just in case the pipeline breaks... >> >> Jamie Lev >> Contract Specialist >> 415-506-6958 >> Fax 610-1601 >> ---------------------------- >> >> Date: 02 Dec 94 08:30:43 >> From:"Anthony Castellino" >> >> To:jlev,tsutherl >> Subject:Fwd: Just in case the pipeline breaks... >> >> This girl is the cheeeeeeeeeeeesiest >> >> Tom- >> in case things don't work out with lynn.. >> >> Jamie- >> in case dana dies in a plane crash. >> >> Thanks, >> Anthony Castellino >> Direct Response Representative >> Ext:(415)506-5739 >> >> Los Dojores and Atlanta are playing at 8. San Diego has a day game around >> 4. Everyone else is traveling. Apparantly Larry himself got a hold of this >> note and she didn't get canned. She still works here. >> >> DO NOT PASS THIS UP...ONCE IN A LIFETIME CHANCE....YOU WOULD BE A FOOL TO >> DENY >> ********************************************************************* >> GENTLEMEN, >> >> Assuming you are all in the prime of your bachelorhood, I am going to offer >> a proposal concerning this year's Christmas party. >> >> NOTE: If you have a "girlfriend", I do apologize, but it's time to break up >> with them and get on the bigger and better things. >> >> For starters, I would like my friends to go to the X-mas party on December >> 17th. I am positive in saying you would enjoy the company of well-mannered, >> well-dressed, intelligent young females, correct? And you all deserve only >> the best. This is why I am suggesting that you eligible young feudal >> knights >> ask one of my friends to the party. This is the perfect chance to meet >> some >> of the most desirable women in the Bay Area in a comfortable and classy >> environment. >> >> You would not have to deal with those nervous, anxious, twitching fits >> which >> often occur when you are around good-looking women because you would be in >> the comfort of you own work atmosphere, plus I will be there to hold your >> hand and guide each one of you through this. >> >> Seriously, it is something to think about. Plus you have all seen me and my >> friends are even better looking than I am, if you choose to believe that. >> It's the perfect set up. >> >> These are a few of whom I would like you to accompany to the event. Below >> is a detailed description. Some of you have met these young honeys. >> >> MICHELLE STEIN - She is a 5'9 Anglo-Saxon with long blond hair, stunning >> eyes and delicious long legs. She prefers you call her "Stein". She's great >> fun and always willing to smoke a bowl or just bullshit with you. She can >> drink a lot without puking and occasionally enjoys a Marlboro Light 100 >> (fair warning). She does not have a serious boyfriend, aids, and is an >> active heterosexual. >> >> ADRIA GIACOMELLI - She is a stunningly gorgeous Italian-American with a >> darling stylist short hair cut. She reaches approximately 5'5 in height, >> and pow, body is like6'-24'-36'. She's got booodddeee and dresses like >> she >> knows it. She does have a boyfriend but what does that mean anyway. >> Besides, >> he is far away, one of those long-distance things. You all would be fools >> to >> pass this one up. She too drinks aggressively without puking and very >> often >> chain smokes. She is crazy but worth every bit of it. >> >> AFSOON MOHKTARI - Don't let the name frighten you. She is beautiful. A lot >> of you know her and she will probably be the first to go, so respond >> quickly. She lives is LA and works as a successful Account Specialist for >> a >> popular PR firm in Century City. She is exotic looking, has a thin frame >> and dresses with the upmost in style and class. She would be a fabulous >> date. She doesn't talk too much and laughs at most funny things. Her height >> is 5'7 and she has dark wavy shoulder length hair. She drinks, smokes very >> little, and smiles a lot. >> >> JILLIAN GUERRA - She is the type of woman you would want to be with on a >> deserted island (in high school she won desert island companion), put it >> that way. SEX, SEX, SEX, she is just like me. She is beautiful, sexy, and >> entertaining all in one package. All you have to do to have this Italian >> Stallion is ask (I >> mean ask to the party). She is 5'5 in height, short brown hair, full lips, >> and booty for days (I mean that in a good way for all you white boys). She >> is currently a non-smoker, due to a throat problem earlier this year. >> >> JEANETTE BARACCO - She also is Italian, upper part of Italy, the >> fair-complected Italians, but she's not that much of a snob. In fact, she >> will have you rolling in tits and laughter all night. She is probably the >> most amusing mother fucker in the whole pack. She smokes and smokes and >> smokes but it does not change how good she looks. She is 5'7 in height and >> her blond hair falls ever so softly around her radiantly pretty face. If >> you >> want to kick it and have fun, this one's for you. She has a man, in >> Compton, >> so I wouldn't mess around. >> >> BERNADETTE DIEPENBROCK - She is the youngest of 12 kids and the craziest, >> best-looking, most intelligent, loudest,...I could go on but I won't. She >> is >> good for anything. Besides her good looks and sexy 5'10 frame this 25 year >> old blond will have you stuttering nonsense all night. In fact, I am not >> sure if any >> of you could even hang with her. I might have to ask LJE if he would like >> me >> to hook him up with an untamable lion like Bernadette. >> >> J-MONEY - She is taken care of, unless you can persuade her to drop the >> Model/Freak of the Week from Sacramento she was going to ask for a better >> offer. >> >> All jokes aside, this proposal is worth thinking about. We could get >> together as a group, get a room, pre-party, party, post-party. It could be >> a >> lot of fun. >> >> Let's do this! Please be in touch regarding this email. You may reach me >> at >> work or at home Of course, you may also respond via email. >> >> Be in touch. - Jacklyn >> >> ----- End Included Message ----- >> >> ----- End Included Message ----- > >
----- End NetScrap(TM) -----
Entered on: 05/10/1998
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